A little bit more about me

Hello, here i am again in the early hours of the morning at my computer! try as i might i just cant go to bed early. and yes i have tried everything, but to be fair my heart hasn't really been in it.

So lets talk a little about me.

Well i am 25 years old and i still live at home with the folks! its not as a sad as it sounds.

I am my mums carer, so my job at the moment is looking after her, although she doesn't want me too.

she would much rather i got on with my own life but i am reluctant to until she is settled in back at home after a long time in hospital. Also my dad has designs on my bedroom! he wants it as a mega study/library.

Saying that i am my mums carer makes me sound like a lovely selfless person, but i am not really. Its just the way things work out sometime.

I was having a hard time at uni studying applied ecology (which i loved) but was constantly ill myself or worried about my mum being in hospital for numerous reasons. Instead of talking about it, i just let the pressure overwhelm me until i just couldn't handle being at uni anymore, i had got stuck in the cycle of trying to finish my second year and after 3 attempts i decided enough is enough. which disappointed me and my family but i needed a break for my poor exhausted brain!

You would think after nearly 20 years of my mum being in hospital i would be use to it, but i wasn't and i am still not. Even from her hospital bed my mum manages to hold this family together, i just don't know where she gets the strength from, but she is my inspiration in life (wow how corny does that sound, but its true).

So while all my friends have been finishing uni, getting great jobs, getting married, buying houses. I am still here at home with the folks, for a short time i really let this get to me, but i can now see some positives in my life. I am now an assistant beaver leader (6-8 year branch of the scouts) and i love that. Yes i know beavers is a funny word but i didn't pick it, so i am stuck with the wise cracks! It is a good thing i have a good sense of humour!

Even more exciting than that i have started a Introductory course in counselling which will hopefully lead onto a diploma, where i think i would like to specialise in working with children and or people and relatives of people in hospital. Both groups are subjects close to my heart. The photo is the one of the men in my life! my nephew Connor in the photo he is getting his first proper salon hair cut!

that's enough for now! I will talk more about the counselling course in a future blog as its a subject that definitely deserves more attention, also so do the little beavers! (no laughing, we are talking about kids!) so will talk about another time as well.

Cheers

Clairexx